I had a friend of mine call me this morning about a personal situation that he is going through. Over the last couple of years, he has turned to me as a "personal" adviser on his life matters. Currently, he is facing job uncertainty in addition to enduring a financial situation that him and his wife created for themselves. In short, he is facing having to go bankrupt over the choices they made.
Today, he was in the ringer over all that is happening. Fear is starting to take control to the point where he is at the end of his rope. Most of us can identify. We all get to that point occasionally. The important thing is what we do when we get there.
My friend is advancing in his growth. Over the last few years, he has learned many of the techniques I write about. Of course, we all need a reminder course periodically. Knowing what to do and remembering what to do are two different things.
We talked for about 40 minutes. One of the most insightful things he said was that just talking about it made him feel better. Sometimes, it is not so much what is said as long as conversation takes place.
When we are confronted with difficulties, either real or imagined, the worst thing to do it to entertain our thoughts. Our minds have a tendency to run freely when we are in this state. It is a dangerous place to be. Sharing with another helps us to get things out on the table. Suddenly, we feel less alone.
Emotions serve as a magnifying force. They cloud sound thought. Whenever we are emotionally charged about something (especially with fear), we really need the clarity that another can provide. It is a simple fact that I can offer solutions easier in those situations that I am not emotionally involved in. This is true for most people. Take a situation, think about it, and add a bit of negative emotion and you have a recipe for disaster.
It takes courage to share with another. Allowing someone else into our thoughts is a scary proposition. We are then vulnerable. There is a risk of that person judging us. We have to swallow our pride and admit that "we cannot handle it all". That is okay. The truth is that nobody can handle all that life serves up alone and anyone who claims they can is a liar. We all need someone we can fall back upon.
So, the next time you are in a bind, find someone to share with. You will be amazed how therapeutic it is.
Share and Enjoy!