Creating The Life You Want

There is a fundamental part of creating the life that you want.  Most fail to miss this basic component which ensures that they are destined to lead a life that is less than what they truly crave.  Instead, they find themselves mired in a state of mediocrity. 

What is this basic building block?  In one word: believe.

To create the life that you want, you first must believe it is possible.  This is a difficult task for most especially when mired in the daily grind that is their present reality.  Most individuals do not have the ability to "see" what is ahead of them.  Their focus remains solely on the negativity which exists in the present moment.

Visualization is a technique that many taught over the ages.  Many will scoff at this notion because the do not believe it works.  It is ironic since all evidence points to the contrary.  To start, when one visualizes, he or she gains clarity over what is desired.  We all are aware that with clarity comes power.  It is much easier to hit a target that is clearly seen than one that is fuzzy or moving.

At the same time, visualization also allows us to focus our attention upon that which is desired.  Some will contest the merits of attaching to you vibrationally what you want.  However, one cannot debate the power of focus and what happens when one concentrates the mind on a single end.  The book "Think and Grow Rich" contained this idea as the central tenet throughout the entire book.

Believing takes a "leap of faith".  The reason why it is believing and not knowing is because it has not materialized in the physical world.  Failure is something that most have experienced.  We know this concept well.  However, life success is another story for most.  Their conditioning leads one to move away from this at every turn.  Over the years we are taught things such as "get your head out of the clouds", "keep your feet on the ground", or "get a safe job to provide security for your family".  These are all concepts which imprison one mentally.

The truth is that your life is exactly that: yours.  You can do with it as you see fit.  If you want to end it today, that is your choice.  Nobody can stop you if this is seriously your intention.  At the same time, if you desire to make it the most wonderful thing in the world,  there isnt an individual on this planet who can prohibit that...except you.  Your life is what you perceive it to be. 

Therefore, if you want more out of life, you need to first believe that a) more exists and b) you are capable of achieving it.  The fact that you presently are in a condition that is distasteful to you should not hinder you in any way.  Many noted success stories started from places much worse than you presently are at.  These individuals did not allow their present circumstances get in the way of the creation of the life they wanted.  Instead of deterring them, the situations often inspired them.  Whatever is your excuse for stopping you, use that are a reason to overcome.  This simple shift is available to anyone who chooses it.

So, begin your journey to success by believing that anything is possible in your life.  Remember, things we often take for granted today, like air travel, were pipe dreams 150 years ago. 
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Small Tasks

When look at personal development, people tend to focus upon the major things in life.  However, few really take the time to realize that often the most effective event in altering one's life is rather small in nature.  Many people can comprehend this but they miss a basic component necessary to achieve a higher level.

Consistency

Success in life comes from being successful.  I will use sports because it will provide a visual analogy that is easy to see.  In baseball, the highest paid players (everyday) are those who hit the best.  While some are what are termed "streaky" hitters, most teams prefer a player who will hit consistently throughout the season.  The ones who go through prolonged hot stretches only to be followed up by long cold spells create a scenario where one cannot be counted upon.  However, the player who regularly goes out and gets 3 hits in 10 at bats will be paid a very high salary.  The consistency when mapped over the course of a season nets a team tremendous production.

Life is the same way.  Too many people try to get results by doing something once (or once in a while).  We see this every New Year when people make the resolution to get into shape.  What happens?  They go to the gym everyday for a week or two then stop.  The desire is quickly removed.  Instead of being consistent with it, they expect a one-shot result.  It does not happen.

Success is the result of following a program on a daily basis that leads to the desired outcome.  Few people ever follow a plan.  Instead, they determine and outcome while just "winging it".  Action will naturally tend to be spotty.  This is where a plan of action offsets the natural tendencies to slack off.

Consistent action that is moving us towards a particular goal will ultimately net that result.  No matter what the desired outcome, as long as the action is consistently undertaken, success will result.

Time

Time is the element that few seem to have a grasp of.  As I just stated, action repeated which moves one towards a desired end will get that person there.  However, the factor that is central to this idea is that of time.  No matter what the action it will get one where he or she wants to go.  However, it might not be the most effective or quickest way to that outcome.

Using the idea of weight loss, simply stopping to drink sugary sodas could have a major impact on one's effort to drop weight.  This single action, if one is a regular drinker of these beverages, will help one to shed pounds over time.  The amount of time required will depend upon a number of factors including how many sodas a day are drank.  Nevertheless, this single, small task, will ultimately move a person towards weight loss.

Moving to the next stage, what if a person wants to lose weight a bit quicker?  Obviously, this is where compounding activities can have a massive impact upon the time something takes.  For example, in addition to giving up high calorie sugary drinks, perhaps this individual begins to walk for 20 minutes each day.  This added exercise will burn calories thus compounding the eliminated calories as a result of the drinks being removed. 

Manipulating time is something that everyone can do.  Time moves in linear fashion but we can increase our results by consistently compounding our actions.  The aforementioned idea works in any situation, not only weight loss.

Small Tasks

Life is nothing more than a series of small tasks.  Few people seem to realize this.  The personal development field is renowned for telling people to focus upon the larger activities first; this is where your greatest impact is.  But is it?  What is a big task really?  When you ponder it for a while, most big actions are nothing more than a series of minor tasks strung together for a large outcome.

This is an area where the personal development field puts itself at odds...with itself.  While it tells people to handle the larger activities, it also tells them to break those tasks down into smaller size "bites".  My feeling is why don't we just focus upon the smaller size tasks to begin with and eliminate one step in the process.

Again, going back to weight loss, if one is overweight there is a simple reason: that person takes in too many calories while burning too few.  That is the only reason why one puts on weight.  This is true for people who do not eat a lot (ie few calories).  Many think that not eating is the way to lose weight when, in fact, the opposite results.  Metabolism will slow down when the body is starved.  Hence we have the situation where, even with reduce caloric intake, this individual still takes in more than is burnt.   Therefore, adding in a small, daily task like walking increases the likelihood of weight loss.  As long as it is done daily (or a few times a week), success will be achieved.

Today, begin to focus upon those smaller activities that will have a net effect down the road.  Remember that all success is achieved through a series of smaller steps all designed to move you in one direction.  Shift your mindset from the "big rock" idea and concentrate on the smaller tasks.  This is how habits are formed.  And this is where one achieves success while on autopilot.  If one does not have to think about working out but, instead, does it out of habit, what do you think the chances are of physical fitness?  Most will agree this person stands a terrific chance.

Implement this idea into your life beginning today and see where it takes you.  Within a week, you will notice a difference.





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Outstanding

This is a word that I want you to consider and think about how it applies to your life.  Is "outstanding" a part of anything you do?  Do you experience a part of your day that is "outstanding"?  Can you ever answer "outstanding" when asked a question like how was your exercise class?  If you are like many, I am going to guess the answer is no.

Mediocre

We are conditioned to accept the mediocre.  This is something that we are taught from the time we leave school.  It is ironic because the educational system rewards outstanding performance.  All merits are based upon getting the highest grades attainable.  Of course, if you can do this, then you are privileged to attend the best schools.  This, we are told, will enhance you chances of getting a better job upon graduation.

However, this is where the confusion arises.  Once we enter the workforce, we are told "not to rock the boat".  Organization such as unions exist to collectively negotiate for all its members regardless of merit.  Middle management is often the goal because upper management appears to be a caste system. 

We see the same thing occur in people's personal lives.  They remain in marriages/relationships which are mediocre.  Weekends are spent tending to insignificant tasks which really amounts to the wasting of time until the next workweek starts.  Few have passion in anything they do but, instead, opt to trudge through life as something to be tolerated. 

The end result is that mediocre is acceptable.  In fact, it is something that many strive for.

Outstanding Is A Mindset

It is a wonderful fact that to be outstanding, one need only to decide to be that.  Few realize the power of the mind and the ability of it to alter one's reality.  Whereas mediocrity is a state of mind, so too is the concept of "outstanding".  And, I feel it is time that everyone adopted this viewpoint.

The starting point is to decide that you are going to experience "outstanding" in all you do.  This is now the goal of every action you take.  Nothing is done with the intent of only being mediocre.  Of course, we must remember that few every utilize the word "mediocre".  Instead, they use descriptive terms such as enough, average, comfortable, and passable.  People strive to just complete the task as opposed to determining the quality with which it is undertaken.  While I will admit there are many situations where one seeks to just "get the job done", too often this is people's approach to everything.  In fact, it is their pattern for life in general.

Outstanding is the highest state of achievement.  It is one step higher on the scale from excellence.  Excellence can be the state of extreme talent.  However, outstanding is the state of separating oneself from everyone else.  Many have excellence in their lives yet few are truly outstanding.  Even the word itself depicts what occurs: one literally stands out.  Going back to our original questions, is there any part of your life that stands out?

Here is an example using my favorite topic: the physical body.  Many people realize they are not doing so well in this department so they decide to make a change.  Most of the time, they establish a goal of "getting in shape".  Perhaps they even quantify it a bit more by putting a number such as losing 50 pounds or getting down to 135 pounds.  Regardless of the method chosen, compare these ideas with the goal of having an outstanding body.  Which one denotes greater passion and excitement.  Would you rather be in shape or have an outstanding body?  The answer should be self-evident.  Of course, to read the later end requires a great deal more effort.  And that is why most usually settle for mediocre: it is a lot easier.

Rewards

There needs to be a payoff for undertaking the extra action necessary to achieve outstanding.  Fortunately, all rewards are forthcoming to a person of this ilk.  In fact, it the outstanding who reap most of the rewards.

Consider the idea of the workplace.  If you are mediocre, what do you get?  People at this level find they get very few of the rewards offered in the workplace.  In fact, it is commonplace that they share in nothing.  Outsourced, downsized, or laid off is a typical outcome for these people.

The same is true for those who are excellent.  While they tend to last longer than the average, they too do not share in a great portion of the rewards.  People are this level are very good at what they do but things are still a struggle.  Many can duplicate what they do albeit with some searching.  Their rewards can be good but rarely will set them apart.

It is only those who set themselves apart from everyone else that receive truly outstanding rewards.  Outstanding people take home the lion's share of the prize.  This is true in all situations.  These are the people who get noticed by others.  Therefore, they profit where others are overlooked.

Getting back to the physical body scenario mentioned above.  Who do you think will attract more of the opposite sex, the person in shape or the one with the outstanding body?  Anyone who ever visited a beach knows the answer to this one.  The person with the outstanding body is going to turn all heads.  He or she is the one who garners the attention of the opposite sex.  The person in shape might have success but the one who achieved outstanding will get to choose from the lion's share.  And this is the difference.  Entering the elite allows one to enjoy a disproportionate amount of the rewards.

In conclusion, I suggest you lift your standards up to the level of outstanding.  This is the quickest and easiest way to move from a life of mediocrity.  Choose one facet today and approach that area with the mindset of being outstanding.  Do this, and notice how quickly your actions change as do the results you get.


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10,000 Changes

Last week I wrote used the analogy that life is like filling up a glass jar with rocks and sand.  The best way to do this is to put the largest rocks in the jar and then fill in around them with the smaller ones and, ultimately, the sand.  This allows for the smaller items to fill in the crevices created by the larger ones.  Of course, if the opposite approach is taken, one would find difficulty fitting in the larger rocks after the jar is partially filled with the smaller items.  This simply would not work.

Going Contrarian

Those who follow the investing world are familiar with the contrarian investor.  This is an individual who goes against the prevailing wisdom.  For example, everyone might be touting how the stock market is going to continue to go up while the contrarian is betting that it goes the opposite direction.  It is a challenge, emotionally, to stray from the masses.  Man does not do well when he is an island unto himself.  We are social beings requiring validation from others.  That is why most people will follow others off a cliff simply because they lack the fortitude to do something different.

Today, I am going to suggest doing something different.  Many people write about finding your purpose and making a grand plan of the most important items in your life.  This is the "big rock" approach which is perfectly valid.  However, many get caught up by the fact that they do not have any idea what their purpose is.  This fact frustrates many and is the main reason for failure.  After a short while, the individual simply throws up his or her hands and says "forget it". 

We are going to adopt radically different tactic then what is was just prescribed.  People get into ruts because everything is the same.  Life takes on a repetitive nature which can make things mundane.  Get up, go to work, come home, go to sleep and do it all over again the next day.  Even on a weekly basis, we see the same pattern.  In short, there is no passion or drive.  Of course, if this person had an overriding purpose, things would be different.  Nevertheless, we need an approach for someone who cannot figure that out.

10,000 Changes

It is time to change things up.  This is the method that I am going to suggest today.  Instead of focusing on larger scale of life, we are going to advocate focusing on the micro.  Contrary to popular belief, a person can radically alter his or her life by doing many things differently.  Even if the "big rocks" are the same, job, family, house, this technique, over time, will help one out of the rut.

10,000 changes seems like a lot.  However, when you consider all the actions you take on a daily basis, it really is not.  Each day, we do thousands of things, most of it unnoticed.  This causes a problem in the fact that we tend to go through life on "auto-pilot".  Little is really notices about the world we live in or how we interact with it.  The mundane aspect of things results when these conditions actions become so ingrained in us that we do little to deviate from it.

Utilizing this approach forces us to look at the unnoticed actions which we are taking on a daily basis.  Even awareness is helpful at creating change.  However, the biggest benefit comes when we make a conscious decision to alter some behavior.  Now an individual needs to be careful not to expect too much from a single change.  This is the reverse of the "big rock" approach.  Sure, if you quit your job, that is going to have a radical impact upon your life.  I doubt very highly you will experience the same magnitude by changing how you hang the roll of toilet paper in your bathroom.  Yet, the bottom line is both are changes.

I am a strong advocate of making tons of minor changes as a means of altering your life.  Anyone who has tried this method realizes that one is quickly conditioned to seek out change.  This is direct contrast to the average person who does his or her best to avoid change.  Most people run from change for as long as they can.  Here, we are moving into the realm of adopting a lifestyle which is based upon change.  It is ironic that this move puts us in accordance with nature since that is system which is ever changing.  In life, there is no standing still.

Start With 10 Actions

The best way to begin this process is to take out a piece of paper and write down 10 changes that you can make rather easily.  Again, we are not necessarily looking for the big rocks although they can be noted.  Here we are most likely focusing upon the sand or, at worse, smaller rocks.  Choosing 10 gives one a good basis for establishing a track record for change.  Plus, if these are minor in scope, they all can be completed in short order.  Getting started is the key.

To help you get started, let us look at a few basic activities.  Which do you wash first when showering, your hair or body?  Do you shave before brushing your teeth or after?  Are veggies a part of every meal?  What route do you travel to work?  Do you allow things to pile up before tending to them?  Are you one to reach for a donut or candy when you are upset?  Do you open your email as soon as you get to work?

Notice how these questions make us focus upon the basics of our day.  Few of these answers are ever considered by most people.  However, delving into all that we do, especially at the subconscious level allows us to make impact changes over time.  Life is literally made up of a series of minor actions all strung together.  Altering even a few of those behaviors has the ability to send us off on a completely different path down the road.

I want you to repeat this process each day for the next week.  Everyday, select 10 actions/things you can change.  After a week, you will have made at least 70 changes.  If you can carry this out for a month, you will be conditioned to look for and embrace change.  Take this a step further, if done for a year, you will be astounded at the radical improvement in your life.  Ruts will be a thing of the past.  Seek to change 10,000 things in your life.  Just the process alone will net you a tremendous windfall.


By the way, while doing this, do not be surprised that if somewhere along the line you do discover some big rocks to tend to.  Many have found their life purpose by pursuing this method.
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